Easy Prey (Love-Inspired Suspense) Page 13

  “I’m not asking him to.” Bernadette shook her head gently. “But I would love the opportunity to get to know my grandson.”

  Jonah smiled. “He’s a great kid. And we should get back to him. He was pretty upset when we left.”

  Elise stood, glancing between them. “If he’s upset, it’s because he’s been put through the wringer by the two of you.”

  She took a step back, her attention zeroing in on his mom. “Thank you for your apology. It’s been a harrowing few days, and I need to get back to my family.”

  Elise walked out, leaving Jonah with a sick feeling in his stomach.

  He opened his mouth to tell his mom bye when his phone rang. The display said Ames. Jonah clicked to answer the call. “Rivers.”

  “Fix set the meet.”

  *

  Elise set the plates on the table. “I’d rather not talk about your mother right now.”

  Wasn’t it obvious she was still processing that whole conversation? Or she was apparently supposed to swallow the mouthful of secrets Bernadette had kept, and simply move on. Either way, Jonah needed to catch on to the fact she couldn’t do that. She just wasn’t wired to roll with the punches. Elise had to reason things out.

  Jonah pulled the store-bought lasagna from the oven and set it on the table. It smelled really good. If this was the extent of Jonah’s bachelor cooking abilities, it was fine with her. They’d be actually equal on something instead of her feeling, at every turn, like he had the upper hand.

  He looked disappointed she didn’t want to talk, but she couldn’t take that on board along with everything else, so she focused on cutting the food and dishing it out. Nathan was at Parker’s house for the night, wherever that was. He’d texted to tell her the marshal had a sick gaming system, and he’d be fine. Like that was supposed to reassure her.

  Jonah sat, and she prayed silently before she began eating. When she looked up, his eyes were fixed on her. “What?”

  “You could have said grace, I wouldn’t have minded.”

  “Oh, okay.” Since he was willing, and she needed it, Elise reached over and held his hand. His strong, warm hand. Don’t think about that.

  She said grace, asking for continued protection, and for God to reveal Himself to them. It was good to see what He was doing. When she wasn’t sure what else to say, Elise closed the prayer. There were things going on in her head Jonah just didn’t need to know.

  He took a bite of food, his attention never leaving her. When he’d swallowed, he said, “Is there anything you want to ask, about the meet with Fix?”

  Elise didn’t think he wanted to hear what she thought. Hailey had called her “mama bear” earlier, and the moniker wasn’t exactly inaccurate. Jonah didn’t need to know she’d taken that on board for him, too. He’d think she distrusted the fact he could be safe. He was a trained marshal. He could, and would, take care of himself.

  Why did she care? It wasn’t like she was in love with him.

  “I can see the wheels turning.” Jonah set his fork down and held her hand, much the same way she’d held his during the prayer. “This is the best way to find out who the trader is, and put a stop to these continued attempts on your life.”

  “I know that.”

  “Do you want to keep almost getting killed?”

  “Of course not. How can you ask me that?”

  “You need to let me do this, Elise.”

  She bit her lip, and to her dismay, tears filled her eyes. Jonah pushed his chair back and crouched beside her. “Talk to me.”

  She set her elbows on the table and put her head in her hands. Taking a deep breath was all she had the strength to do. Jonah’s hand rubbed up and down her back. “You can trust God that I’ll come through this, right?”

  Because he didn’t think she could trust him? Or because he didn’t think God would make her suffer the death of someone she cared about…again.

  Elise turned to him. “Do not get hurt.”

  To his credit, he didn’t smile. “I wasn’t planning on it.”

  “I know you aren’t, but—”

  “Look.” He squeezed her shoulder. “Fix is meeting the trader and I’m going along for the ride. Fix will accept a shipment tomorrow night and I’ll be there under the guise of helping. We’ll catch them in the act, and as soon as I give the signal, my team will swoop in and arrest him. The end.”

  Okay, so he knew how to make it sound simple. “I still don’t like you doing this. He killed the reporter. It could be a trap, you know.”

  Jonah sat back in his seat. “Wow, Ms. Tanner. With all that concern, I might actually think you care about me.”

  She didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. “I’ve always cared about you, Jonah. That was never the problem.”

  His eyes darkened. “If that’s true, why did you never speak to me after I left?”

  Did he really expect an answer that would satisfy him? “Maybe it was because you left.”

  “Well, now I’m back, and so are you.”

  As if that had fixed anything. “Lo and behold, everything’s the same. Your mom still thinks I’m the poor girl from the trailer park. The only reason she wants to make amends is because of Nathan.”

  “She got saved.”

  “And now I have to forgive her, or I’m the small one.” Elise pushed her plate away. “Why do I always have to be the one to bend for everyone else? My mom. Fix. Your mom. Martin. You. The only person in the world who doesn’t ask me for anything is Nathan. And he’s the only one who has a right to everything I am.”

  “I’m sorry, Elise.” To his credit, he seemed genuine.

  “Me, too.” She got up, moving to the door. “I’ll always be the poor girl you shouldn’t be with, and you’ll always be out of my league.”

  “Elise—” He stood. “I need to tell you the real reason I left.”

  The little dinner she’d eaten churned in her stomach. She needed sleep, but all she would probably get for the effort was restlessness, lingering pain. Nightmares. She sighed. “Let’s go sit in the living room.”

  He nodded, relief washing over his features.

  When he was settled beside her on the couch, Elise turned slightly toward him, bracing herself.

  Jonah swallowed, his eyes on his hands clasped between his knees. “I knew I had to get space. To figure out who I was. All the usual ‘I’m twenty and I haven’t found myself yet’ stuff. But there was more to it than that. I needed space from you.”

  She felt her eyes widen. “Me?”

  “I couldn’t help how I felt about you. I knew you were special from the moment I met you, but there was nothing I could do about it. I was four years older and my dad warned me, over and over, not to do something that would get me in trouble.” He blew out a breath between his lips. “The marines seemed like a great way to experience life.” He looked at her. “And to give you the time you needed to grow up.”

  How he felt about her?

  As in, the same way she’d always felt about him? And he’d left? Elise squeezed her eyes shut. God, I didn’t know that. I could have had everything I ever wanted, but I thought he walked away from me.

  Elise had been right. Jonah would always and forever be out of her league. She straightened, realizing this was her one chance to say what she had to say before he found out what she’d done. “Thank you for protecting me.”

  He’d protected himself, and he’d obeyed his father. But it was love for her that meant Jonah made the hard decision at an age when that was rare. As painful as it had been to go through, Elise knew now that he’d made the right decision. For both of them. They hadn’t been ready for a relationship. She hadn’t been. And yet it wasn’t long after that she let Martin persuade her into exactly that.

  Jonah squeezed her hand gently, then let go.

  “Elise?”

  She looked over at him. Was that love for her in his eyes?

  “Will you tell me why you married Martin?”

  SIXTEEN<
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  She was up and off the couch before he realized. “I should get to bed. I have to get up and catch a tiger in the morning.”

  Jonah knew she wasn’t feeling good. It was barely nine and she likely did need sleep, but he felt like if they didn’t talk about this now, the chance would slip from his fingers. “Don’t go, Elise. Don’t leave now. I feel we’re finally getting somewhere.”

  She looked…scared. Why, he didn’t know. There was obviously something here that she didn’t want to get out. “What do you want from me?”

  She didn’t want to know the answer to that. Jonah wasn’t going to put that on her now, when she was hurt and exhausted. He was trying to give her some semblance of peace, since talking to his mother hadn’t managed to do so.

  Jonah stepped closer to her, just in case her fear got the better of her and she decided to run. Again.

  When he had her attention, he said, “There’s a reason why I’ve never married, Elise. There’s a reason why I’ve never found anyone else.” He let that sink in. “When I left for the marines, I knew the next time I saw you that things would be completely different for us. What I didn’t know was that it would take this long for that to happen.”

  Elise was shaking her head even before he was done. “No, I don’t believe you. I’m not the reason you’ve been alone all this time. I can’t be. Don’t put that on me, Jonah.”

  “I’m not trying to load you with guilt, and I don’t feel like I’ve been alone. That’s not what I’m saying. My life has been full, with work and…” Okay, so there wasn’t much else. But part of him felt like maybe he’d always been waiting for Elise. “I’m just really glad you’re here now, and I don’t want to lose you.”

  Her face softened. “I don’t want to lose you, either.”

  “Then I need an answer to my question. Now.” He waited a second. “Did you love Martin?”

  “Yes.”

  Jonah flinched. He didn’t want to betray his true feelings, but it was too late now. He’d already told her the truth of why he left for the marines. If she didn’t feel the same way, he would deal with it. Eventually he’d figure out how to get over her, even though in nearly twenty years he hadn’t managed it.

  “But not in the way you think.” She bit her lip and looked down. “Martin…” She sighed. “He understood I didn’t love him the way I should have. The way a wife should. He was rebelling. You’d left, and your mother was pressuring him to quit drinking, to quit partying. I think he figured that if he married me it would be the perfect comeuppance to her.”

  “Why would you say yes to that?” Martin had used her?

  She blew out a breath and looked at the window, where the blinds were closed against the night sky. “I didn’t think of it like that. All I could think was that I’d get what I’d always wanted. Maybe not exactly what I imagined, but a facsimile of love, and family, at least. I would finally have everything I’d never had growing up. ”

  She looked up at him, her chin raised, daring him to think badly of her. “I was selfish. Looks like I really was just out for the Rivers money, after all.”

  “Elise—”

  “Turns out your mom was right. My mom. Fix. The whole town. Even Martin knew the real reason we got married. He got to throw it in your mom’s face when I moved in to the pool house with him, and I got to pretend I was the princess living large.”

  “I don’t believe you.”

  “Well, it’s true. You’re the only one who didn’t see it.”

  “Tell me the truth.”

  “I just did.” She screamed it, and Jonah flinched.

  He shook his head. “You were a kid barely out of high school.”

  “I was an adult.”

  “That doesn’t mean you were mature enough to make that decision. It’s why I left. I knew you were too young, and so was I. We both had a lot of growing up to do, and I naively thought you would know. That you’d wait.”

  “How was I supposed to know that’s what you wanted me to do?”

  Now, finally, they were getting somewhere. “That stung, didn’t it?”

  “You know it did.”

  Jonah folded his arms across his chest, heavy with ache. “I didn’t know you’d marry Martin.”

  “I didn’t know you would just leave me, and never look back!” Her face was red, her eyes filled with tears.

  “So you just gave up, took the first offer that came along?”

  “I had to.” She sucked in a breath. “It hurt too much.”

  “Because I left you?” The ache in Jonah’s chest got worse.

  “Because you abandoned me to them. Suddenly I had no defense, no one on my side.”

  “Except Martin.”

  “He didn’t feel the way you did, you know that.” She bit her trembling lip. “I was so scared. So alone.”

  Jonah wanted to gather her in his arms, but he didn’t. They had to finish this.

  “I knew you’d forget about me and never come back. I knew you’d realize I wasn’t worth it, so I married Martin. We were friends at least. But then he died. And the kicker is, it was better.”

  “Being a single mom?”

  “I had to rely on God. I had to be strong even though I was so scared, and I did it, Jonah. I did it, and Nathan thrived. I had to know I didn’t need you or I’d have always relied on you, for everything. You’d have been my strength, instead of the Lord. It would have torn me apart to live like that, so wrapped up in you.”

  She swiped the tears from her face. “It hurt. And it was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do, but after Martin died, I knew I couldn’t be that selfish kid anymore. I needed the space to find out who I was with no one to lean on. I had to know I could take care of Nathan on my own. That I could give and not always expect things to be handed to me. I know I’m not a good person, but now at least I know God loves me and so I can be better. In Him.”

  Jonah stepped closer. “I loved you with a childish love a long time ago. Now you’re grown. You’re strong, you’re a fantastic mom and a wonderful woman, and it’s been a pleasure getting to know you now, Elise.”

  She looked like she didn’t know if she should be happy, or still upset. “But…”

  Jonah smiled, touched both her cheeks and held her head in his hands. She was still so little, she brought out all the protective instincts he had inside him. The feelings he had for her now were so much more than before, in maturity and in strength.

  “No buts. I just wanted you to know how much of a pleasure this has been. And I’m so sorry you’ve been hurt.” Multiple times, and he hated seeing her scared and knowing she was in danger. “I’m going to make this better for you, because I want us to have the chance to see what could be between us now.” He paused a beat. “And I need to know if that’s what you want, too.”

  Elise smiled, even while Jonah wiped tears from her cheeks with his thumbs. “I’d like the chance to see if this could work now.”

  Jonah lowered his head, finally free to show her how he felt. She’d had enough words from him, and he’d been more open with her than with anyone in his life. But she was special, and she would forever hold that part of him.

  When he was a hairbreadth from her lips, the doorbell rang.

  Jonah groaned low in his throat and touched her forehead with his. “I’m sure they’ll go away if we’re quiet.”

  He felt her shake with silent laughter.

  He pressed a quick kiss to her forehead and went to answer the door.

  *

  Elise stood back while Jonah opened the door. Deputy Marshal Shelder strode in, a grocery sack swinging from her hand. “Special delivery.” Jonah grabbed the sack and rummaged in it before looking up at Hailey, incredulous. “A mullet wig?”

  Elise burst out laughing. Jonah’s head whipped around and he glared at her. She swallowed the humor and saw Hailey was also fighting it. Elise cleared her throat. “So when’s the meeting?”

  Hailey answered. “Tonight.” But Elise looked at J
onah.

  “Seriously?” She was supposed to go to sleep while he went with Fix to catch the animal trader? “Were you planning on telling me this was happening tonight, or was I meant to just wake up tomorrow to find it all over?”

  Jonah said, “I was going to tell you.”

  “Really?” Her mind was spinning, especially after she’d finally admitted how totally selfish she’d been in assuming her chance with Jonah had been over and marrying his brother just to escape her life. Everyone had something they regretted, but hers was like the elephant in the room she couldn’t ever escape. Especially not now she was back with Jonah.

  Well, with—as in, they were in the same room. Not with.

  Now that the fog of anticipating his kiss had passed, all the old fears were resurfacing.

  “I’m going to go change.”

  He strode away down the hall, and Elise stood there feeling like a lemon. Did he think she shouldn’t worry? That she wasn’t scared for him? He was going into a dangerous situation, just like always. It was the choice he’d made, because he was the kind of man who put his life in danger to protect people. But that didn’t mean she had to like it.

  And it didn’t mean she hadn’t stayed up many nights over the years, worrying if he was okay. Praying he would be, even if she never saw him again.

  The fact that they could be together now was little more than a dream, and everything she’d ever wanted. She knew she didn’t deserve it, but everything she had was by the grace of God. Jonah’s love wouldn’t be any different.

  “You okay?”

  Elise shook off her thoughts and looked at Hailey. “Sure.”

  “I didn’t…interrupt anything, did I?”

  Like Jonah’s hands on her face? His lips touching her forehead.

  “I did!” Hailey clapped.

  Elise laughed. “Don’t get ahead of yourself, okay? Things are far from established, but better than they were.” She glanced at the closed door to his bedroom. “We cleared the air some.”

  Hailey had a knowing smile on her face. “I see that.”

  And though she’d expected Jonah to dislike her for being such an awful person, he didn’t. Sure, she tried to be better now. But that was yet more grace.